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By the time I slipped the shackles of my parents' institution-like "home" and moved into my townhome at age thirty-one, I'd had it! I was done with men, done with dating, done, done, done! It was perfectly fine with me if I lived out my days in single blessedness, rattling around in that big house with my bichon frise, Delly, and my doxiepoo, CweeCwee.
Together, we formed a little furry family. They watched interestedly, heads cocked to one side, while I sang them Broadway show tunes. Slept together, crowded onto my twin-sized bed in a muddle of arms, legs, tails and cold noses. If I forgot to be careful and accidentally stretched out during the night, there'd be a "thud" as one sleepy dog accidentally hit the floor.
They always had such a surprised expression when they jumped back on the bed. Or maybe that's just because I have a bad habit of drawing eyebrows on my dogs. For one blissful year, I lived the hedonistic life of a woman who, for the first time in her life, was responsible only for herself.
Ah, it was wonderful. Doing whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted with no need to consider anyone else.
Taking long, hot baths. Cultivating a balcony garden. Cooking dinner at midnight.
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Vacuuming at 5 a. Her theme song always made me get a little weepy. But after a golden year alone, a fly crept into my ointment. Suddenly, one of my singles sites crackled to life. I started getting messages His profile said he was a retired engineer. And I'm a sucker for an engineer.
I married my husband after dating him for three weeks…and it’s working out.
From that day on, every spare moment was spent on the phone with him. If I wasn't sleeping or showering, we were on the phone. He became my alarm clock, calling to wake me at six every morning.
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We talked 'til I got to work. Talked during the day. Talked from the moment I got off work to the moment we fell asleep, still talking on the phone, at two in the morning. The night he fell asleep while talking, his sentence trailing off into sleepy gibberish, I lay awake and listened to his breathing, wishing he was there with me, instead of two hundred miles away. And soon, I was obsessed with one thought. Do you want to go on a date with me?
Fuck yes, I wanted to go on a date with him. I cannot tell you how good it felt to be asked out in person. Not over a hook-up app or social media. So we exchanged numbers. A couple of weeks later we went on our date. It was on June 21st. He brought me a bouquet of sunflowers and took me to one of the best restaurants in town.
We were at the restaurant for almost 4 hours. After dinner we decided to drive up to Lake Tahoe and go for a swim under the moon. It was close to midnight. After our dip in our underwear, we sat on the shore and saw several shooting stars in a matter of minutes while drying off. That shit was magical.
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We drove back to Reno, went to another bar that was close to my house and had a couple more drinks. Around 3AM he walked me home and kissed me goodnight. I really liked him. And I knew he really liked me. After I was finished moving I called him and he was grabbing a beer with a friend so I met up with him. We got dinner, walked around downtown, then he showed me his place.
I went home super late that night because I had to nanny early the next day. Then we hung out the next day, and the next day.
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We knew so many of the same people, but for some reason, it surprised them seeing us together. That night he told me he loved me and that he was going to marry me. Going to that wedding with him, made it very clear to me that I was in love with him. And that I wanted to marry him too. He made me laugh. Each guy I have dated has been very different from the last. There was one thing that really struck me about him… It was how much the people around him adored him.
Since we had so many mutual friends, it was the people around me who adored him. I was constantly being told how great of a guy he was and how much he was admired by people that I knew and trusted.
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Before he passed away he was married 5 times, to 4 different women. Divorced her when I was 6 then remarried her shortly after. They divorced again when I was Whatever the hell I wanted, really. Planning gives me so much anxiety.